Election campaigns are not about ideas, they’re about words; lots and lots and lots of words; 90% of which signify absolutely nothing. It is like Twitter but with only a few members online. They speak obscurely and the rest of us do everything we can to make the message even more obscure once we've logged in to comment on their words.
Everywhere we go, there is talk. People are texting, emailing, tweeting, posting, calling and chatting but for all that chatter, there is precious little actual communication happening. In the 60s, the lack of understanding between the generations was called the communications gap. Today, we have a communications deficit. There is lots of noise with lots of words but precious little communication.
In fact, if words were money, language and understanding would have a bigger debt than all the western democracies combined. We would be bankrupt.
This is partly due to the fact that few of us are listening to anyone. We’re too busy talking and voicing our opinions. In some cases, it is the result of being under informed. In others it’s arrogance, dishonesty or emotional overload and in a few cases it’s just sheer stupidity.
There are days when I scream silently for informed debate and discussion with someone who deals with reality rather than his or her perception of it; someone who sees the world as it is rather than as they wish it was. I have a few friends I can turn to for that communication but sometimes, I turn to a source of pure and unvarnished honesty; someone who sees his world as it is and who is unafraid of expressing his opinion about it openly and plainly. I turn to that source to remind myself that it is actually possible to communicate simply, honestly and effectively.
That island of communications sanity is my three year old grandson Ben.
Ever since he started communicating, Ben has expressed himself with great enthusiasm and a singular, simple focus that is both refreshing and informative. Before he was a year old, my daughter taught Ben how to sign and he took to it expressing himself like a bird takes to flight. He was liberated by his new-found ability to connect with those around him. Once he learned to talk, there was no holding him back and next to Monster Trucks, communicating is his passion.
Ben sees the world as it is, not as it is portrayed by special interest. He is not embarrassed to acknowledge what he doesn’t know and is curious enough to ask questions; endless questions at times. He is proud of this toy or that rock and is constantly requesting that you come and look with him at whatever it is that has caught his attention but mostly, he has opinions about his small world and he likes to share them.
These are some of Ben’s observations that he has shared recently.
On Chinese Food
"Rock on plum sauce"
Brutal Honesty:
One day, while his mother was changing into her bathing suit when Ben barged into her room and pointed out that she was naked. Then he pointed at her and asked "What is that". She replied, "You know what that is, it is my vagina". He replied, "I don't want to smell that thing".
On Housework
Ben: Mommy what are you doing with Daddy's vacuum?
Mom: It's not Daddy's vacuum, it's our vacuum.
Ben: Are you sure it isn't Daddy's? I've never seen you use it.
On Hockey
Ben: Daddy in hockey, the red light is for a goal, the green light is for no goal and the blue light is for darn it.
Dad: What is the blue light for?
Ben: Darn it, like when Mommy forgets to give Annie her money.
On Friendship
Ben: Do you want to go to the garage and do karate?
Keaton: Yep.
Ben: Did we just become best friends?
Keaton: Yep!
(Keaton is a Clint Eastwood type, a man of few words)
On Being A Good Neighbour
“It’s not ok to poop in other people’s gardens right, mommy?”
On Fashion
When his mother put a new sun hat on his baby sister Adele, Ben observed:
"That hat makes Adele look like a lamp".
Three year olds understand the true purpose of language. They may have a limited vocabulary but they aren’t afraid to use it. It’s a shame we take that away from them as they grow older. I wonder how much better we would be served by an election campaign where the candidates and their supporters were as honest and plain-spoken as toddlers rather than as sophisticated as adults.
Unfortunately, it won’t happen.
Somewhere between being three and being adults we are taught how to use words in all the wrong ways. We lose the ability to communicate despite learning thousands of new words. Wouldn’t it be nice if instead of just learning how to talk, we learned how to talk intelligently; how to use words to explain, express and learn rather than to confuse, obscure and divide?
There are lots of words around these days, including my own but at the end of the day; the words that seem to be the most honest are the words that come from Ben and his friends and others like them. They say what they mean and mean what they say.
Out of the mouths of babes? You bet! Wouldn’t it be nice if we all communicated with that same simple honesty?
© 2012 Maggie's Bear
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